Duties Towards Each Other
1. The husband. According to divine ordinance the husband is the head, the king, the support of the wife and the children. St. Paul writes in the fifth chapter of the epistle to the Ephesians, “Let wives be subject to their husbands as to the Lord; because a husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ is head of the Church … Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the Church, and delivered Himself up for her …Even thus ought husbands also to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife, loves himself.” From this it is clear that the exercise of his authority is not to be severe and cold, but considerate and kind. The wife is his partner and companion, not his servant.
Married love obliges him to take good care of his wife and children. Therefore he must be industrious and saving, plan and manage wisely. No company should be dearer to him than that of his family. The man who prefers the tavern or club to his home neglects serious duties and forgoes exquisite pleasures. It would be wrong to leave domestic affairs entirely to the wife. She is entitled to cooperation and recognition. He certainly bears a large share of responsibility in maintaining a wholesome atmosphere in the home and in keeping out dangerous influences. Finally, he owes it to his wife to provide for the uncertain future as well as he can by reliable insurance.
2. The wife. She is the heart, the queen, the providence of the family. Happiness in marriage depends to a great extent on her. She should strive to be a delicious compound of sweet temper, courtesy, and self-sacrifice. Her kingdom is the home, where she reigns as queen of love, doing all in her power to make it cozy and pleasant. Many men seek outside distractions, because their wives neglect them and their homes. The wife must be reasonably economical in dress and housekeeping, see to order and cleanliness, have nourishing and well prepared meats ready at the right time, cheerfully accede to all reasonable wishes of the husband and be an example of piety. A real helpmate usually holds the affection of her husband.
My insistence on mutual love may surprise you. Does not your presence here show that you are in love with each other? Yes, but very likely your life will not be always as rosy as it is now. When the charm of living together has worn off, you will discover weaknesses and faults in each other. Even trifles are sometimes very annoying. You must be ready to make allowances and practice patience. Marriage is for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. Think of the words of St. Paul: “Bear one another’s burden, and so you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Gal. 6,2) If peace has been disturbed, restore it at once --- not with many words, but with a friendly handshake or hearty kiss. Forgive and forget and never speak of such painful incidents to others.
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